


Grace

by Tortellini



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Boyfriends, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Heartbreak, Heartbreaking, Heavy Angst, Homophobia, Homosexuality, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Light Angst, M/M, Male Homosexuality, POV First Person, Period-Typical Homophobia, Sad, Sad Ending, Season/Series 01, Wordcount: 100-500
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-14
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-06-06 06:12:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15188534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tortellini/pseuds/Tortellini
Summary: It seems all our bridges have been burned...you say that's exactly how this grace thing works. (Roll Away Your Stone by Mumford and Sons)Oneshot/drabble





	Grace

"Thomas...you silly, silly boy..." 

My face felt hot. I wanted to go back downstairs and smoke. And I wanted to kick off my shoes and crawl in bed. Really, I wanted to be anywhere but here right now. But Philip--the Duke of Crowborough--wasn't finished with me yet. 

"You think you can threaten me?"

He's toying with me, I thought. Why wasn't I more worried?

The letters. I still had those. 

"Aren't you forgetting something?" I downed my glass of whiskey and turned to face him. He smiled, hands in the pockets of his bathrobe. It was a cruel smile. 

"No, I don't think I am."

"The letters," I growled then, though admittedly my voice was weak too. He couldn't know that. He probably already did. I felt relief, triumph. "Your letters. To me." If those got out he would be ruined. 

Because they were love letters. 

"Oh. These?"

He reached into the dresser and to my absolute horror, pulled out a bundle of old, tightly bound by string...letters. 

"One step ahead of you, Thomas," he continued, and he was still smiling. Tossing the bundle from hand to hand he continued. "Now. What shall I do with these? It's so exciting, isn't it? Shall I erase my name from all of this--me, innocent, disgusted by all of this nonsense. Shall I make up a bit of a story?" His smile got wider then. 

"You've been in my room." I said hoarsely.

"Perhaps." He smacked his lips.

I lunged at him then. He was bigger than me, a bit older too. Arms wrapped around my middle. He spun and threw them into the fire. Everything was gone. I sagged helplessly in his grip, my head bent. When I felt a hand on my hair though, I recoiled and jerked my head up. His lips were an inch from mine; he sneered. 

"Go to bed, Thomas. Unless you want to stay?"

I swallowed bile and tears as I turned on my heel and left.

My chance for a better life, for actual love--was gone. Never to come back. 


End file.
